What have we done?

I usually tell myself that I am going to complete this blog post before Sunday evening, but for some reason, I always end up doing other things instead. This weekend was quite enjoyable for me. I stayed in my residence hall and spent time with friends on Friday evening, after finishing a long week at school which included a midterm on Friday morning. Saturday I woke up at 10 am to meet with my father, who was visiting from Asheville, and travel to Cary for a referee assignment that I had. I refereed the Duke women’s soccer match against Minnesota University. From there I grabbed some Indian cuisine with my father, and returned to campus for some intense racquetball.
While in the car, on the way back to campus, I mentioned to my father that I wondered what it would be like to live in the 60’s and 70’s. I had a Simon and Garfunkel song stuck in my head, and its sweet melody and creative lyrics brought me into a state of deep thought on the meaning of life as we know it today. I know that to many, this is not a profound event, but for me I really questioned a lot.
In modern times, it seems to me that a majority of people are preoccupied within our recent technological craze. People are constantly focused on a screen, whether it is a computer, television, iPod, or any other device. Everyone is always in a hurry to hustle and bustle and fit as many things as possible into one day. I am aware that I partake in these activities, largely because of school and other obligations, but it really overwhelms me at times. Many days I feel have just flown by without any real significance coming out of them. Did I meet anyone new? Did I invest in my personal relationships with family or a loved one? To me, I think it is possible that with modern societal norms, people overlook the simplicity of just living. I mean, imagine what this world was like thirty years ago. Sure people were busy with work and school, but even then the social scene was different and most likely the pace of life.
With all of these “improvements” in our lives, we can find the cheapest gas in town online, we can drive to places we have never been to before with the push of a button, and we can access almost any piece of information known to man with a computer. This almost takes the joy out of living, I feel, by making things so convenient. We lose appreciation for the “hunt” or the search for things. Now trust me, I love the internet and it is extremely helpful, I was just using it as an example. I do think, however, that we have advanced to the point where people have lost the concept of living by trying to enhance everything that we were provided with. I do not think it is necessary for us to rid ourselves of all of our amenities, but I think a balance is necessary.

Giving Back to the Less Fortunate: Necessary or Optional?

On both Friday and Saturday, I devoted large portions of my time to volunteer. On Friday, I participated in a Habitat for Humanity build. My work consisted primarily of roofing work. I helped put tar paper down on the roof and also carried 70-80 pound packages of shingles up a ladder. On Saturday, I got together with some graduate students and went to Club Nova. This club is a house where mentally ill people come to be served meals and some are even housed behind the club.
Now, this is not the first time that I have volunteered. I have experience working at other places including Habitat for Humanity back home in Asheville. But for me, Club Nova was a completely different experience. I was interacting with people that are normally not encountered in everyday life. All were adults with varying levels and cases of some form of mental illness or disturbance. Some resembled characters from the film “Radio” while others were interested in super heroes. Regardless of their illness, I really enjoyed interacting with these people. They were very polite, grateful, and appreciative of our cooking and cleaning up. So after having these experiences, I pose the question: should we as a society take it upon ourselves to care for the less fortunate, to what degree, and how?
I remember at the beginning of this semester some of you guys were talking about the welfare system and how people on welfare were taking advantage of the system. You claimed that they were driving nice cars and owned other things that indicated a more luxurious lifestyle. I personally cannot agree or contest that statement because I do not have enough experience seeing these things. However, I do believe in humanity and taking care of each other, so I do support the concept of welfare and taking care of the less fortunate.
I am sure that some of you are in complete disagreement, which is fine, but let me first explain why I feel this way. First, you must put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Imagine being born with a disability that prevents you from working. Imagine being stuck by disaster that causes you to lose everything you had in life. Not fun huh? Maybe then you would want some help? The purpose of government is to serve its people and I feel that this is a valid way of serving some people. Secondly, there are people out there who do not abuse the system and need government care so that they can get back on their feet. The real issue is regulating this system so that people do not abuse it and actually make progress from it.
People cannot be given everything, or they will not grow from it. Poverty tends to be cyclical and with provided opportunities, many should be able to grow and seek jobs and education to better themselves and their financial situation. So the degree of care should depend on the situation. Certain levels of need should be established by financial analysis and other factors to be determined by the government. Then, to make sure that these people do not abuse it, more accurate applications should become standard so that the government is not fooled by some people’s illusions. I know that Club Nova is for mentally ill patients and it is generally agreed upon that they should be cared for because it is not their choice to be disabled. But I do know that they are as equally deserving of care as people who do not have the ability to support themselves or their families, whatever the situation may be. We are all humans and we are all created equally, so why can’t we all be able to access equal opportunity and aid?

Experiences

So for some reason, I was under the impression that because of Spring Break, blog posts were not due this weekend. But just in case, I checked many other people’s blogs and found that you published posts.
So I don’t really have much on my mind now. It is late Sunday evening, the night before classes resume from Spring Break. I had a good break. I was able to relax, sleep in, and spend time with my family and my girlfriend. Over this break, I realized how drastically people have changedhabi, including myself. Friends from high school do not act the same or necessarily have the same interests as before. Some are too focused on school work (not necessarily a bad thing), while others are too preoccupied with their friends from college. As if they do not spend enough time with them in the first place!
Every break I have from school, I tell myself that I am going to devote some time to working on school work. Unless something is immediately due, this never happens. I wonder why I even bring my backpack to school. I consider myself a good student, but for some reason I view my home as an escape. It is a haven of missing comforts. I never thought it would be this way, but as a second semester freshman, home has what I need, rest, food, family, and my bed. Along with being unable to complete work, I never find enough time to reunite with every friend I want to. My girlfriend is moving to Hawaii this Wednesday with her family because of the Air Force, so I dedicated most of my time to her.
Despite being extremely busy with family and my girlfriend, I did manage to catch up with a few friends. Unfortunately some of my buddies have changed, and not necessarily for the better. One of my pals is dipping now, and he acknowledges that it is a bad habit. He even has a friend who has just been diagnosed with mouth cancer for the third time! Hello! Wake up call! Well, I am not his mother and do not nag him or lose sleep over it, but I did find it somewhat disturbing and dramatically out of character for him. But I feel that I need to evaluate myself as well.
After having almost a year of college under my belt, I feel a lot of things have changed for me to some degree. My relationships with my family have improved, dramatically in some cases like with my high school sophomore younger brother. I think distance makes one treasure what they have, plus not having to be in each other’s space constantly is a nice plus. Also, I think I have gained a more broad sense of what is out there in the world after just a little exposure to Carolina. I feel I was an aware person of my surroundings, but I think I have gained a better sense of what life is like in the real world and how I am going to prepare for it. I hope.

Family Values

The elusive vacation known to college students across the nation as “spring break” has finally arrived for UNC school system schools. Most students will be traveling to warmer locations in hopes of beach fun, drunken nights, and spring flings with the opposite sex. Many students, like myself, will be returning to their homes to spend quality time with family and friends, or will they? Something I have noticed is plaguing our nation’s families; the erosion of family values.

Not long ago, I was home for winter break and the holidays. I was surrounded by family and friends. It was a very enjoyable time. As a matter of fact, I was invited to spend some time at a good friend’s house. I spent the afternoon with him and was invited to stay for dinner by his mother. I gladly accepted the invitation, expecting a pleasant family gathering filled with discussions and catching up with one another. Instead, to my surprise, dinner was spread across the kitchen counter like a buffet. I was told to fill my plate, while my friend’s parents ate and watched television in the living room. My host’s sister was watching television in the kitchen area, and my host wanted to go to the basement to eat and watch football. I know this may not be shocking to many of you, or it may be, but I was raised in a family where dinner is considered family time.

This is likely not a new trend in American households either. The more technology advances and the more Americans value the phrase “time is money”, the less quality time is spent with family. Americans spend more time working than any other nation in the world. Some argue that this is a way to maintain American international power, influence, and security. But is it really worth the sacrifice of family time and values? It is just sad for me to see that families do not spend time with each other like they used to. Of course not all families are like this, but from my observations it seems like it is a growing occurrence. It is no wonder that divorce rates are so high in our society and family problems are considered a norm. Is it safe to attribute all of these societal issues to the absence of a nightly family meal? It is possible, but I am sure there are other contributing factors.

Ultimately, we college students live away from home for a majority of time during the year. So it is only logical for me to think that family time should be cherished when the opportunity is presented. I know that I will not spend every evening I can eating with my family, but I do know that when we eat, it will be together with the absence of outside distractions like the television or computer. I find these to be extremely anti-social and distracting. So next time you find yourself wanting to watch television at dinner time, remember that your time with your family is limited and should be enjoyed when possible.